what happens to heretics
Sometimes I wonder if we have really exhausted the various heresies we could believe in. There are so many heresies possible. I'm in seminary, these are the things I think about. First let's go over some of the classic heresies:
-gnosticism: Jesus was fully God but not fully human. He probably didn't even have a body. Matter and the material world is sinful and bad.
- marcionism: the God of the Old Testament is different than the God of the New Testament.
- montanism: if you die a martyr, you go to heaven.
But what about all the other heresies out there? Surely we can be more creative.
How about some heresies like:
- allieism: warm cornbread that your roommate makes you actually saves you. the one loophole.
- dinosanctificationism: dinosaurs were also made in the image of God, but they ended up sinning more than we did so God destroyed them during Noah's flood.
- kieslichism: if you eat unicorn poop, you live forever.
if i could only get my hands on the next shipment that i got coming in from canada.
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